A long pause — have not touched the brush for the last few days
I always ensure that I draw and paint on regular basis. I enjoy my work and always look out for new ideas and inspirations. Recently purchased the much awaited watercolour journal for artists and was delighted to see the package upon its arrival. Soon it was the time to unpack and have that yearning towards the book. Smooth and subtle to touch, that mild aroma emanating from the fresh pages and that sheen was all enough to make me want to draw immediately. I was calm yet excited. I just draw for myself and it gives me immense joy. Have been experimenting with portraits now, trying different mediums and watercolours being my favourite next to pastels. I feel happy when I see artists of all levels illustrating their works, also sharing their work on social media. I could see that gleaming and bright happiness on their face right away. In my scenario, this was not the case. I draw to get away from the negativities back home, lack motivation, unforgiving circumstances that compel me to put my pencil down soon after I thought I would paint. That overall energy declines and this happens often.
Last week went to my locality park to sit and draw in the evening and this for the first time as I have been planning a lot to draw and paint in the outdoors. Again, it was not in my favour. In the late evening it is either too hot and humid else fill in the void with clouds and rain. I decided not to ever go to that location. It is difficult to derive joy from such small things. I just watch the art tutorials on the popular video hosting site and try recreating in my own way. Shadows and light are never easy to work with even though they are simple to be honest. I refer hundred of photos for references and sometimes it becomes a hard choice to choose from. Few days ago made a choice to paint a portion of the city in my artbook. Managed to draw the outlines but since things are not always pleasant back home I chose not to paint for few weeks. That whole energy feels like it is drained away. People and artists are lucky who paint often, daily with enthusiasm. I try a lot but cannot assimilate all of this. There was a time when I used to draw and finish it the same day. Now it feels like ages at a slow pace stumbling across unwanted stones. There are many photographs and references that I saved in my laptop thinking I would paint some of them, but that seems not so near to me though. Some parents are supportive and some are not and repulsive. I am still thinking and thinking as to when the I would be able to finish the painting which I have left at the outline stage.
- Pramod Sharma, Hyderabad.
